Ostade jedno selo (Gornje Ljubinje) kod Prizrena bez vode pa su zatražili od susednog sela (Mušnikovo) da im posude jedan izvor vode. Nakon neuspelog dogovora na lokalnom radiju se čuje pozdrav:
-Selo Gornje Ljubinje pozdravlja selo Mušnikovo sa pesmom pusti pusti vodu...
-Selo Gornje Ljubinje pozdravlja selo Mušnikovo sa pesmom pusti pusti vodu...
Kada su Sašu Matića pitali kako mu je bilo u Monacu.
On je odgovorio:"MRAK."
On je odgovorio:"MRAK."
Kad su počeli oni nesretni ratovi, mobilišu i Lalu, u izviđače. Pošlju ga na front, a tamo ga pošlju da vidi da li se može preko nekog mosta. Vrati se i veli: Tenkovi i kamioni mogu, al' pešadija ne može. Ima jedna kera, k'o tele, na sred mosta vezana!
pisalo u novinama da je Partizan pobjedio dinamo kijev.ivica to vidi i vikne:tooo.rece mami da je partizan pobjedio,a mama rece ivici da je vidila da je izgubio 8:5.ivica ode u izdavacku kucu i uhvati glavnog sefa i prebije ga.sef je krvario i rece ivici:JEBEM ti majku.ivica zaboravi to sto mu je sef rekao .prebaci se na drugu stvar:Partizan.zasto ste lagali,sef kaze:da dobijemo vise novaca.ivica kaze:jebat cu ti mamu,tatu,baku,dida,prabaku,pradjeda cak i babinu protezu .drugi dan pisalo da je partizan izgubio 1:0 opet dode u izdavacku kucu i rekao da je sad dosta i ode kod babe .baba odmah zagrize kurc.ivica odmah ode sefu i kaze:tvoja baba ima dobre zube.ivica se otrcao doma a sef sam sebi kaze: ako moja baba ima dobre zube mogla bi me stitit .i sef prijavi babu na natjecanje jebanja.
Dođe Mujo kod Hase i pita ga dali je nasao smoga psa.
Nazalost nisam!
Pa sto ne stavis na oglas mozda ga nadjes.
E moj mujo stavio bi ja, ali ima jedan proplem.
Pa koji.
Moj pas nezna da cita.
Nazalost nisam!
Pa sto ne stavis na oglas mozda ga nadjes.
E moj mujo stavio bi ja, ali ima jedan proplem.
Pa koji.
Moj pas nezna da cita.
Ivo sanader uhvati sina kako pusi cigare i pije rakiju.
kaze Ivo njemu sine pa kako mozes pusiti i piti pa tek si 5. razred.
A sin mu odgovori pa tata i ti si pio i pusio kad si bio 5. razred;jest tako je sine al tad je tata imao 17Godina
kaze Ivo njemu sine pa kako mozes pusiti i piti pa tek si 5. razred.
A sin mu odgovori pa tata i ti si pio i pusio kad si bio 5. razred;jest tako je sine al tad je tata imao 17Godina
A woman’s view, or is it true?
1) He said . . . I don't know why you wear a bra; you've
got nothing to put in it. She said ... You wear
pants don't you?
2) He said ... Shall we try swapping positions tonight?
She said . . . That's a good idea - you stand by the
ironing board while I sit on the sofa.
3) He said . ... What have you been doing with all the
grocery money I gave you? She said . . . Turn sideways
and look in the mirror!
4) On a wall in a ladies room. .. . "My husband follows
me everywhere" Written just below it. .. . “I do not"
5) Q. How many honest, intelligent, caring men in the
world does it take to do the dishes?
A. Both of them.
6) Q. How does a man show that he is planning for the
future?
A. He buys two cases of beer.
7) Q. What is the difference between men and government
bonds?
A. The bonds mature.
8) Q. Why are blonde jokes so short?
A. So men can remember them.
9) Q. How many men does it take to change a roll of
toilet paper?
A. We don't know; it has never happened.
10) Q. Why is it difficult to find men who are sensitive,
caring and good-looking?
A. They already have boyfriends.
11) Q. What do you call a woman who knows where her
husband is every night?
A. A widow.
12) Q. Why are married women heavier than single women?
A. Single women come home, see what's in the fridge
and go to bed. Married women come home, see what's in
bed and go to the fridge.
13) Q. What is the one thing that all men at singles bars
have in common?
A. They're married.
14) Man says to God: "God, why did you make woman so
beautiful?" God says: "So you would love her."
But God," the man says, "why did you make her so
dumb?" God says: "So she would love you."
And she does!
1) He said . . . I don't know why you wear a bra; you've
got nothing to put in it. She said ... You wear
pants don't you?
2) He said ... Shall we try swapping positions tonight?
She said . . . That's a good idea - you stand by the
ironing board while I sit on the sofa.
3) He said . ... What have you been doing with all the
grocery money I gave you? She said . . . Turn sideways
and look in the mirror!
4) On a wall in a ladies room. .. . "My husband follows
me everywhere" Written just below it. .. . “I do not"
5) Q. How many honest, intelligent, caring men in the
world does it take to do the dishes?
A. Both of them.
6) Q. How does a man show that he is planning for the
future?
A. He buys two cases of beer.
7) Q. What is the difference between men and government
bonds?
A. The bonds mature.
8) Q. Why are blonde jokes so short?
A. So men can remember them.
9) Q. How many men does it take to change a roll of
toilet paper?
A. We don't know; it has never happened.
10) Q. Why is it difficult to find men who are sensitive,
caring and good-looking?
A. They already have boyfriends.
11) Q. What do you call a woman who knows where her
husband is every night?
A. A widow.
12) Q. Why are married women heavier than single women?
A. Single women come home, see what's in the fridge
and go to bed. Married women come home, see what's in
bed and go to the fridge.
13) Q. What is the one thing that all men at singles bars
have in common?
A. They're married.
14) Man says to God: "God, why did you make woman so
beautiful?" God says: "So you would love her."
But God," the man says, "why did you make her so
dumb?" God says: "So she would love you."
And she does!
Mama sa sinčičem šeče zooloskim vrtom.
Mali zastane pred slonom i pita mamu:
-Mamice,ispricaj mi kako na svijet dolazi slon.
Ali nemoj mi opet reci da i njega donese roda.
Mali zastane pred slonom i pita mamu:
-Mamice,ispricaj mi kako na svijet dolazi slon.
Ali nemoj mi opet reci da i njega donese roda.
Doslo babi pismo iz amerika i kaze joj postar:"Evo neno doslo pismo iz amerike avionom."A nena rece:"Sto bolan lazes ja te vidjela da si dosao sa motorom